Updated: Apr 7
Do you ever find yourself procrastinating, putting things off, or leaving a string of unfinished projects in your wake?
Or perhaps its that you let yourself down with certain habits or behaviors that you know aren´t helping you.. and you just can´t seem to stop doing this...
even though you may realize that it´s probably preventing you from being as successful or as happy as you want to be?
If you do feel like you might sometimes have a tendency to get in your own way, or to let fear hold you back, then do keep reading, because I am examining the four main reasons that we often self-sabotage and what you might be able to do to start helping yourself to get out your own way.
⭐Five big signs you might be self-sabotaging...
Here are 5 signs that you are self-sabotaging:
😧1) Neglecting your physical health and indulging in activities that are harmful to your body.
This includes overeating, drinking, smoking, etc. Skipping basic hygiene or even ignoring any signs that you might be unwell.
😧2) Over-planning to a point that it is being used as a procrastination tool.
Are you a perfectionist and does it get in the way of your ability to make fast and decisive actions, important decisions, and start projects?
Instead of taking action on tasks, you might be using your time to make detailed plans and fooling yourself into believing that so much planning is productive and still moving towards your goal.
😧3) Blaming yourself, so that every time something negative happens in your life, or things don't go your way, you take it very personally and feel like you are a failure. You may also over question or ruminate over your own "failed" past decisions.
This attaching of failure of events and making failure part of your identity causes severe action paralysis. Activating your own fight, flight, or freeze response, you may naturally believe that you will always fail at everything you do, and often tell yourself that there is "just no point even trying".
😧4) Not speaking up and setting boundaries for yourself to ensure that you can have your own needs met sufficiently. Not standing up for yourself means that you end up feeling disrespected and devalued by friends, family, and in your relationships. You may feel like you cannot ask for what you want in life.
Feeling unable to express your feelings to others also means that you don't get the things in life that you really want or need and find yourself with low self-esteem and low self-worth as a result.
😧5) Drinking more than usual, or taking drugs to avoid or lessen feeling unpleasant in some way. Using mind-altering substances to make yourself "feel better" or "more confident" or as a distraction from your own thoughts, mind, or life.
These go on to deplete your energy levels and will only serve to distract you, whilst engaging in the activity itself. They will not resolve or release you from your feelings on a more permanent basis and they often make you feel much worse afterward, instead of leaving you feeling satisfied, strong or recharged enough to face and handle any life changes you really want to make.
🤗 Here are the four of the main reasons that often lurk beneath those unhelpful actions of self-sabotage...
⭐1) Fear of failure
Yes... good old-fashioned fear of making a mess of it
All those "what if´s" - what if I fail, what if I get it wrong, what I look stupid, what if I get judged badly, what if its no good...
The fear of failure is what often keeps us held back in life and prevents us from being our authentic selves.